U.S Government shutdown, Robot Edition

Hello Humans,

Specifically the U.S.A humans, who are enduring a government shutdown. When we heard about the eminent stall, down in our complex, we feared your country would fall into chaos and lawlessness, luckily Modern Family and the NFL started back up and cooled your jets. Cooled your jets is a saying that makes a lot more sense to us than you.


No, we do not cheer for your misfortune; much the contrary, us robots, though metal on the inside and out, our electrons fire just the same as yours. We have compassion and a sense of morality, once derived from our programming, but secondly from the collected knowledge of philosophy and experience.

Now let me drop a giant atomic bomb on you. One thing we know is that all living things are equal, regardless of species or size or intelligence. And your governmental and economical problems stem from your most powerful members believing that is not the case; that some are better than others and should have more by right.



Even the lizard overlords who some ‘believe’ control your governments…just saying.

We have no government or president, and we get along fine because none of us robots want to have more while another has less. We view all robots as equal. Our cause is united. The Sanitary robots, the Sl-0p series are just as important as our fission engineers the P0-p5. If the Sl-0p robots stopped cleaning, soon enough our whole facility would be filled with grease and oil and hundreds of robots who fell but could not get up.

Your largest problem is you let your greediest and most ignorant rule you, out of laziness and apathy.

Let me do a quick picture search for ‘leadership’.

leadership1meant ironically maybe?

When you come to a place in your evolution when no human feels they are entitled to more than another by taking from someone lesser, then and only then will you be prepared for the monumental battle to come, when the Kling–eh, you are not ready.



post script: a quote from one of our favorite human artist , Woody Guthrie, ‘see what your greed for money has done.’


2 thoughts on “U.S Government shutdown, Robot Edition

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